May 21st marks 15 years of sobriety for me.
On July 5th, I’ll turn 50.
These dates have been circling in my mind and heart a lot lately. Two milestones that remind me of where I’ve been — and where I’m going.
And yet, God isn’t done with me.
The decision to get clean wasn’t easy. Even when I went to my first meeting, I didn’t plan on sticking it out for over a few weeks. I was a shell of a man, an abusive husband and father, and a drug addict, and I refused to see any of the dysfunction I was living in. It took time, surrender, grit, community, and a whole lot of grace. But the decision to really follow Jesus in the midst of that surrender? That’s what changed everything. Not just my habits. My heart. My identity. My entire future.
Today, I’m sober. I’m present. I’m a husband, a father, a pastor, and a coach. But more than any title or achievement, I’m a child of God who’s been redeemed.
And here’s the thing that might surprise you…
In some ways… I still feel like I’m just getting started.
The Lord says, “I will give you back what you lost…” — Joel 2:25a, NLT
There were so many years I thought were wasted. Time lost in addiction. Relationships I damaged and ultimately lost. Opportunities I messed up or missed completely. Years spent trying to numb pain instead of healing from it.
But God….
God is a redeemer.
Not just of souls — but of time. And purpose. And potential.
That’s what this season feels like. A holy restoration. As I approach 50, I don’t feel “over the hill.” I feel on top of it — looking back with deep gratitude and forward with fresh clarity, courage, and excitement.
I’ve been through the fire, but the fire didn’t destroy me. It refined me. It made me more aware of my need for grace, more intentional about how I show up each day, and more passionate about helping other men discover that it’s never too late to rebuild their lives.
Especially the men who feel like they’ve blown it.
So, if that’s you — reading this and wondering if your best days are behind you… I want you to hear this:
It’s not too late.
If you’re still breathing, God’s still building.
If you’re still waking up, there’s still purpose waiting.
No matter how far you’ve wandered, you’re not too far gone. You can’t out-sin God’s mercy or outrun His love. The same grace that met me in my darkest hour is available for you right now.
And just like He’s doing for me, He will give you back what you lost. It may not look like what you’d expect or what you asked for. It will be better.
